Most of my blogs on this site have been focused on how you feel about yourself, raising your self-esteem level, achieving personal goals and treating yourself and other people with respect. Now it is time for my favorite topic! When you put all of the elements of who you are together, show that you can make good decisions and use a common sense approach to what needs to be done in order to advance your life in a positive direction, your intelligence level shines through! I know not everyone is necessarily book smart. Although being book smart is important, it is equally important that you be intelligent.
There are ways to increase your intelligence level and when you improve in those areas, you can have an intelligent conversation with just about anyone, discussing just about anything and feel confident in knowing that your input is just as important to the conversation. So, here are a few tips to do just that:
Reading Really is Fundamental - A great way to sharpen your mind is to READ! Reading is the basis for everything that you will do in life. The more you read, the more you learn. Do not limit yourself to one type of reading material. Read often and read everything! Reading builds your vocabulary, as well. Read your local newspaper to stay current on what is going around you; read novels on whatever subject entertains you or sparks your interest; read how-to books on any hobbies that you may have; if you have little ones in your life, read children’s books to them – Again read often and read everything!
Think before you speak! - Sometimes we think just having something to say is enough to hold a conversation. Unfortunately, if you just say words just to hear yourself talk, but do not put much effort into the content of what you are saying, then you are speaking empty words, and soon you’ll find that people rather not listen to you. But if you talk with clarity and forethought, you become a beacon of light for people who want advice or need direction. Gossiping and badmouthing others can get you in a lot of trouble, so be intelligent enough to stay away from those terrible forms of conversation.
Your actions speak for you: When you continually say one thing, but do the opposite, you lose your credibility. Let your word be your guidance. If you say you are going to do something, short of it becoming the impossible to do, give your every effort to follow through with your word. Otherwise, you become the boy who cried wolf and people will begin to question whether you are trustworthy in your actions.
Be a Leader: You have a great mind!! Use it! When you know what the best decision is for a positive outcome in a situation, and you know that the things you do have a major affect on your life or others, step up to the plate and take care of business. You don’t have to wait to be told to do what is already obvious. Being intelligent means choosing long term choices over short term pleasure. If you know you have a test that you need to study for and your buddies try to convince you to attend “the party of the year” (which they all seem to be!). An intelligent decision would be to skip the infamous party and study. You will certainly feel the long term affects of that decision over the short term pleasure of some party that you will find was not all that great to begin with!
Listening is key – I know you may think you have all the answers, but you first have to learn how to listen to the question! You will be surprised what you can learn simply from listening! Whether you’re listening to someone else’s opinion or listening to someone else’s problems, the best way to be responsive is to thoroughly listen. This is really key in a relationship. When couples are busy going back and forth with each other, nothing gets resolved because no one has bothered to hear what the other person is saying. You can’t give a solution if you haven’t heard the problem. So, if you are always quick to respond, just take a deep breath and make sure you have heard everything that was being said then respond intelligently!
Help Others Make Good Decisions – If you follow these tips, you will find yourself increasing your mind’s potential, no matter what your intelligence level was to begin with. Your intelligence, coupled with your healthy self esteem will give you the tools to help others make good decisions. People will start to value your opinion and seek your advice for many things. The feeling that you will experience from helping others without wanting or needing anything in return will only make you want to continue to improve yourself so that you will always be at the ready when someone needs your intelligent advice!
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2 comments:
Dolly, what do you suggest for how to handle being in a situation where your boss or immediate supervisor gossips? They are in positions above others and this doesn't set a good tone for the workplace. Could you address this in some kind of sub-category?
Any gossiping, especially by a boss or supervisor, who should know better, can certainly be detrimental to the workplace. The main thing that you need to be sure of is that you are not part of it at any time, for any reason. Part of what I teach is to rise above negative surroundings and in order to do that you need to be agressive, yet subtle enough to know how to handle all types of people. For example, if you are in a direct conversation with your boss or supervisor and he/she starts to gossip, simply say that you do not feel it is right to talk about other people's personal business when they are not present. Depending on what type of policies your workplace have that allows you to talk to someone on the same level or a level above your supervisor, please use that chain if the situation gets out of hand. Please know that you cannot change the way people are, but you do not have to and should not participate in that kind of behavior. If you feel like you are in a hostile environment, and your comments may be intepreted as being insubordinate, please be sure to document everything that goes on between you and the supervisor so that you have written proof of your actions and your supervior's actions.
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